‘Why I’m Returning My New IPad’

Published: April 1, 2012

‘Why I’m Returning My New IPad’, My new iPad is going back to the store.

I paid $600 for the 32GB Wi-Fi model, and although I like it well enough, I don’t think it’s worth the money.

Before the Apple faithful take my head off, allow me to explain — and to note that I’m keeping my original iPad. Also, I have such mad love for my iPhone 4S, I want to cook it breakfast every morning. You get my meaning; this isn’t just wayward iPad-bashing.

When Apple announced the new tablet, I was underwhelmed but intrigued. I’d skipped the iPad 2, so I figured I “owed” myself this upgrade. Plus, it would be a business expense; I do write for a blog called iPad Atlas, after all.

Mostly, though, I got caught up in the hype. After reading gushing praise for the new iPad’s Retina Display and blazing processor, I had to see what the fuss was about.

The fuss, it turns out, was more overblown than a Kardashian wedding. The screen? Yep, it’s nice. Does it make my eyes leap from my skull and dance a marimba cha-cha? No. Neither does it cure cancer or introduce me to supermodels, despite what some drooling bloggers intimated.

The new iPad is admirably peppy, though I never found my original iPad to be slow. My kids enjoy messing with the built-in cameras, but that’s a luxury I certainly don’t need. Using an iPad to snap photos or video is like driving a monster truck to the grocery store: uncomfortable and impractical (to say nothing of showy). The only thing that I’ll actually miss is big-screen FaceTime — but for those moments I can always Skype on my laptop.

4G LTE? Again, nice, but I have no need for it. And that leaves…what? The new iPad is a little slimmer, a little faster, and little easier on the eyes than the original. Not enough, Apple. I want my $600 back.

As fate would have it, a Kindle Fire arrived shortly after the new iPad. (It’s a loaner, due back to Amazon in about a week.) As you’re no doubt aware, it’s a hair less expensive: $199.

Yes, it has a smaller screen, less storage, no cameras, no 3G/4G, no Bluetooth, and so on. But you know what? I love the little guy, because it better suits my needs.

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